We’re three months into 2020 and I’m still recapping 2019 lol. That’s okay. A lot happened and I’d be remised to not share how God showed up and out.
On November 23rd, 2019, I was officially conferred a special title – Mrs.
To be quite honest, I’ve always wondered how I would capture a year and a half worth of wedding planning into 1 blog. or, how I would share 2 wedding days-worth of content with readers in a concise manner lol. It’s a lot. This new title of “wife” has been such a sweet, yet interesting journey for the last 3 months. It’s felt good to put everything I’ve learned from relationship conferences, pre-marital counseling, and mentors’ advice to use.
For those new to ATBM, here’s the quick spiel: on our one-year anniversary of courting, Belema proposed and we became engaged- check out the post here. We were engaged for what seemed like forever lol. A whole year and a half. 18 months. Whew. But, every day of those 18 months was so needed. We were able to save for our wedding and married life, plan effectively, and discuss marital goals.
Wedding planning season felt like madness and I KNOW that I KNOW that I KNOW ONLY JESUS could’ve gotten me through that period with my sanity intact. At a point, I was in school full-time, working night-shift as a nurse full-time, completing clinical hours, serving in a campus ministry and church, doing hair (wedding coins had to be made lol), ALL on top of fully planning a 600 person wedding. Yes. That number is correct. In all honesty, towards the end, I regretting not hiring a wedding planner. Many days, I was running on 2-3 hours of sleep, simply trying to make it to the nap. I was strugggggggling. Shout out to my wonderful mother for taking a lot off of my plate, especially during test weeks. Double shoutout to my amazing husband for talking me off the ledge several times and being so hands on in the planning process.
If you’re a lady or gent that’s currently wedding planning (or ever hoping to be), here are 5 things that can make your life easier:
Start Planning Early!! I cannot stress this enough. Whether you’re engaged for 6 months of 16 months, the big day will creep up on you faster than you know. Make sure you solidify your venue, photographer, and videographer as soon as you can!
Save. Save. Save. Weddings cost money (duh) and lots of it lol. Create a reasonable spending budget and work towards saving that amount.
Expect the Unexpected. Clothes that don’t fit, late RSVPs, last-minute payments, and videographers losing footage…yeah. Wedding planning isn’t perfect, but you can lighten the load of stress by being prepared for what by coming. Always stay one step ahead.
Keep your Teammate in Mind. There are any times when decisions need to be made and often times, women make the decisions and that’s that lol. Be sure to keep your to-be spouse in the loop as much as possible! Give them the opportunity to give input so that it is a day the two of you will look back on and smile about.
Last but definitely not least, understand that MARRIAGE GOES BEYOND THE WEDDING DAY. It sounds so simple, yet, it’s a concept that gets lost in the wedding planning sauce. Be sure to invest in biblical pre-marital counseling that will help you and your spouse tackle whatever challenges the future may bring. The beauty in marriage is that God has designed it to last forever - use the wedding planning season to actively invest in your relationship’s spiritual health.
Our day was beautiful and everything we would’ve hoped it could be. God was honored, we laughed, we danced, and saw faces that we hadn’t seen in some time. If you enjoyed this post, be sure to check back for a list of all the things you don’t need to tell or ask a bride that’s wedding planning ☺️ ATBM gets a lil spicy next week.
Lots of Love,
Mrs. Abere
PS: Enjoy a few wedding photos and our highlight video! (Photography by Liliana Leahy @lilianaleahyphotography and Jonnie Henriquez @Jonniehphotography_)